Okay. What the fuck is up with this “circus clown” bullshit? The snowman is PARSON BROWN, people. PARSON MOTHERFUCKING BROWN. You’re turning a beautiful song about pretending to get married by a snowman into some kind of messed-up clown snuff fantasy. Can’t Bill O’Reilly or one of the other members of the U.S. Strategic Bloviater Reserve call a boycott until this travesty is put right?
(Update: It has been pointed out to me that the “circus clown” verse is merely the second verse of the original song. Okay, I can get behind that – who doesn’t want to spend their honeymoon at the circus “having fun” with a clown, after all? – but this merely shifts the responsibility to whoever lopped off the first verse in whatever cover version it is that plays at the grocery store. Shame on you! You’ll be sharing a circle in Christmas Hell with the people who put out the “Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaanta Claus is comin’ to town” version of THAT song.)