Hey, now you can go right to Ben’s tweets via a little Twitter icon just to the right. Unless you’re reading this several years in the future, in which case, younglings, “Twitter” is that thing that ‘The Born Loser’ and ‘The Wizard of Id’ in your local newspaper just now started making jokes about. That thing your grandparents talk about sometimes, from the beforetimes. Before the great sun fell from the sky and the metal-skin raiders came, and a handful of water became more valuable than all this accursed gold… the gold which carries the blistering death. Can you believe humankind of old used to prize this worthless metal! You can’t even make a spearhead to fight the raiders with this. Soft! Useless! Man grew decadent, hypnotized by the Twitter while the politicians and the warmongers rattled their sabres and brought the Great Sun which burned the world. Look, look here, my child, at this twisted and pustule-ridden turnip I have wrung from the soil with a simple iron hoe. This! This is life! This is reality! Not the Twitter-dream of the ancient fools.
Of course the preceding was just a little flight of fancy. There won’t really be newspapers in the future!